I'm back from my trip! And boy what a trip it was! For those of you who forgot, I've been in Europe for the past two and a half weeks. It was a mainly educational trip, so I thought I would share my wealth of newly-acquired knowledge with you.
First of all, Europeans do not know how to cook. Their food is so bland, it makes vanilla look like an explosion of flavor. Rarely will you find salt or pepper, much less ketchup or mustard, in a restaurant. Salad comes naked, and meat unseasoned. Every liquid in Europe comes scalding or luke-warm. Ice does not exist.
France is largely populated by furries. One can deduct this by walking down any street or watching any channel on television. Your mind will be bombarded with images of sexy, scantily-clad anthro-animals. Be it deer, dolphins, bears, raccoons, jellyfish, dogs, cats, even cacti and bamboo. You will see it all, and you will see alot of what you see, if you know what i mean. These scantily-clad freaks of nature are the advertisement of
Orangina, an admittedly delicious orange drink that puts Fanta to shame. But at least Fanta advertises with sexy HUMANS.
Museum guards, even the Swiss army at the Vatican, are complete pushovers and wimps. Signs reading "no cameras alowed," or "no speaking in the Sisteen Chalpel," are totally irrelevant. The guards will stand by, idly watching as the Sisteen Chalpel mosh pit ensues, lit by the ceasless, damaging flash of one thousand uncaring, felonous cameras.
Air conditioning is provided in most hotels. They quite effectively turn a 100 degree room into an 80 degree room. And a job well done.
Oh but it wasnt all bad. I really truly did enjoy myself.

See, look at how happy I am in that photo. At least... I think I'm in that photo...
Where am I...
Oh well! No new comic this week, but its in the making for next week so GET PUMPED.